Blooming

Water has no effect on fake flowers.

The first time I heard that, it knocked the wind out of me. Because it explained years of frustration I couldn’t quite put into words. For so long, I thought the problem was me. Maybe I just wasn’t pouring in enough, enough patience, enough kindness, enough late night pep talks, enough second chances. If I just tried harder, showed up more, bent a little further, surely that relationship would bloom.

But you can water fake flowers all day long, and nothing changes. They’ll sit there looking perfect, maybe even fool you for a while, but they’ll never grow. They can’t.

That realization changed everything for me. Because real relationships whether personal or professional are alive. They respond. They may wilt if neglected, they may require effort, but when you give them care, they show signs of life. They grow with you. Fake ones just drain you.

So instead of beating myself up with the question Am I giving enough? I started asking a better question, Is this capable of growth?

And that one mind shift has freed me from pouring energy into things that were never going to change or grow.

Here’s where it really hit me, work.

I used to think if I just gave more time, clearer communication, extra patience, more encouragement, every professional relationship would eventually click. But some of them never did. Because some work relationships are fake flowers, too. They look polished. They sound promising. But no matter how much effort you invest, mentorship, collaboration, giving credit they don’t grow.

The difference is subtle but it matters. Real work relationships, even in tough seasons, show progress. You see trust building. Collaboration gets smoother. New ideas spark. There’s momentum. With the fake ones, it’s just…nothing. Static. Artificial.

And here’s the kicker you have to stop confusing difficult but alive with dead on arrival.

The difficult ones are worth watering. They will stretch you, challenge you, but they will grow. The fake ones take energy you will never get back.

So now I weigh the question Is this relationship capable of growth? If the answer is no, I stop watering. I turn toward the people and projects that are alive.

Because life is too short and work is too demanding to keep pouring into anything artificial people, relationships, or growth.

ღ Chi