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One Day I am Divorcing This Alarm Clock

 

Alarm Clock, I want a divorce.

We have grown apart.

I have changed.

For real it has been toxic for a while now.

At first, it was cute. A little chime here, a gentle buzz there. You nudged me awake with a sense of purpose. A job to do. A meeting to make. A life to build.

But now? You just scream at me.

Aggressively.

At ungodly hours.

With zero regard for my REM cycle, my soul, or the fact that I stayed up doom scrolling until 1:47 a.m. because my brain refuses to shut off without a fight and a snack. 

And what do yo even wake me up for? My calendar is jam packed and impossible to manage. Emails flood in nonstop. Meetings meant to be quick drag on forever and never end without me saying I have to drop for another meeting. I am not waking up to chase dreams. I am waking up to chase down project timelines and approvals. I do not want to rise and grind. I do not want to even rise. Not until my Outlook reminder says I have 4 minutes to mentally prepare for a camera on call with 17 people and no agenda. 

One day, I will leave it all behind. I will silence that alarm once and for all not just hit snooze like the emotionally codependent sleep deprived professional I currently am. I will wake up naturally, stretch like I have time, sip coffee like it is not my personality, and do something wildly rebellious like think before checking my inbox.

But until then?

We will stay in this strained relationship me and the alarm clock. Bound by calendar deadlines, fueled by caffeine, and hanging on by the fragile promise of maybe things will be lighter next week. And every morning, when it screams, I will mumble back one day, I am leaving you.

ღ Chi



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